The Wolves have been up and down during the season’s first quarter.
2006-2007 NBA Quarterly Update
Over the years, I’ve managed to make a large number of analogies to the Timberwolves. There have been references to movies like Rocky IV, The Shawshank Redemption, and even Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. I’ve related the Wolves to songs from U2 and Dave Matthews Band. But for the first time, I’m going to put my med-school education to use and make a medical analogy to sum up the Wolves current situation. Because the 2006-2007 Minnesota Timberwolves share astounding similarities with atrial fibrillation.
For those of you who haven’t brushed up on your heart arrhythmias lately, atrial fibrillation, or A-fib as the “cool” doctors call it, is when your atrium beats very quickly and out-of-sync with the rest of your heart. (For those of you seeking a more detailed explanation, feel free to brush up on your cardiology at MedSkool.Net) Atrial fibrillation is characterized by an EKG pattern that is “irregularly irregular”. While not imminently life-threatening, A-fib is a problem because your heart just isn’t pumping blood as effectively, and in a worst-case scenario, it can cause blood clots in your heart which can travel to your brain resulting in a stroke.
So how does this relate to the game of basketball, you ask?
Well, I think that it’s safe to say the 2006-2007 Timberwolves have been “irregularly irregular” in their play. Trying to predict whether the Wolves will win or lose on a particular night is like flipping a coin. Half the time you’ll be right, and half the time you’ll be wrong. It doesn’t matter how bad or good the opponent is, who’s suiting up, who’s not, if it’s a back-to-back, if they’ve had four days off, if they’re on a winning streak or a losing streak, if it’s home, away, Western Conference, Eastern Conference, division game, or a must-win situation. There’s just absolutely no way to tell how this team is going to perform on any given night.
We’ll beat the Jazz then we’ll lose to the Raptors. We’ll get blown out by 20 points, then the next night we’ll blow somebody out by 20 points. We’ll win four in a row and follow it up by losing four in a row. We’ll get burned by a buzzer beater then we’ll win on one ourselves. Fourth quarter heroics are replaced by fourth quarter meltdowns. It’s an absolute crap-shoot every night.
Yet despite the maddening inconsistencies, the Timberwolves are a mere game out of the playoff picture. It’s a hopeful sign, knowing that if there’s even the slightest bit of improvement, the Wolves will be in the post-season for the first time in three years. But at the same time, like atrial fibrillation, the Timberwolves just aren’t playing basketball as effectively as they should. If this team is content to simply be an eight seed and notch another first-round exit for this franchise, they can keep the inconsistency going. But if they actually want to make some noise in the playoffs, the Wolves need to get themselves on a more regular pace quickly.
And like the worst-case scenario of a stroke, remaining irregularly irregular could eventually cost this franchise something dearly. By all accounts, Kevin Garnett has been nothing but loyal to Minnesota and a trade request isn’t even an option. But after missing out on the chance to pair with Allen Iverson, adding yet another disappointment to KG’s resume as a Timberwolf, one can only wonder how much more the Big Ticket can take. If this team gets swept badly in the playoffs, or, worse, fails to make it for a third year in a row, Kevin Garnett, like that blood clot, may choose to wander off in a direction that would cripple this franchise.
Maybe this was a really weird analogy for a basketball piece, and a little more morbid than many would care for. But I honestly couldn’t think of a better analogy to the current state of the Wolves. The good news? Atrial fibrillation is very treatable. With the right combination of medicines or procedures, most people’s conditions can be fixed.
The same goes for the Timberwolves. While it won’t be as easy as popping a pill, this team’s irregularity problems can be corrected. It may take a concentrated effort by Mike James and Ricky Davis to avoid their frequent “off” nights, further maturation of our rookie duo, or perhaps better game-planning by our coaching staff. No, the answers aren’t clear and the future isn’t certain, but thankfully, we have leader with a gigantic heart of his own to show us the way.
Predictions:
EASTERN CONFERENCE
Atlantic Division:
1. New Jersey
2. Toronto
3. Boston
4. New York
5. Philadelphia
Central Division:
1. Detroit
2. Chicago
3. Cleveland
4. Indiana
5. Milwaukee
Southeast Division
1. Orlando
2. Miami
3. Washington
4. Charlotte
5. Atlanta
WESTERN CONFERENCE
Northwest Division
1. Utah
2. Minnesota
3. Denver
4. Portland
5. Seattle
Pacific Division
1. Phoenix
2. Los Angeles Lakers
3. Los Angeles Clippers
4. Golden State
5. Sacramento
Southwest Division
1. Dallas
2. San Antonio
3. Houston
4. New Orleans
5. Memphis
PLAYOFFS:
EASTERN CONFERENCE:
1. Detroit
2. Orlando
3. Chicago
4. New Jersey
5. Miami
6. Washington
7. Cleveland
8. Indiana
First Round:
Detroit over Indiana
Cleveland over Orlando
Chicago over Washington
Miami over New Jersey
Conference Semifinals:
Miami over Detroit
Chicago over Cleveland
Conference Finals:
Miami over Chicago
WESTERN CONFERENCE:
1. Dallas
2. Phoenix
3. San Antonio
4. Utah
5. Los Angeles Lakers
6. Houston
7. Minnesota
8. Denver
First Round:
Dallas over Denver
Phoenix over Minnesota
San Antonio over Houston
Los Angeles Lakers over Utah
Conference Semifinals:
Dallas over Los Angeles Lakers
Phoenix over San Antonio
Conference Finals:
Phoenix over Dallas
NBA FINALS:
Phoenix over Miami
